In the Last Chapter…
Robyn’s best friend, Kathy, appears to be dating Matthew. Against her better judgment, Robyn is giving Jordan oral sex more and more often, although she manages to convince him to ask her instead of tell her. Robyn witnesses Quinn Shen, Kevin’s brother, talking about her in the hallways, although Kevin insists Quinn was talking about someone else. Even so, Kevin makes Robyn promise not to bring the Hazelwood Underground up anymore. Robyn discovers that Jordan is meeting afterschool with an unpopular kid nicknamed “Hunchback” under mysterious circumstances. Eager for the truth, she hunts him down, finding out he’s in the school choir. Robyn opts to go to the choir to meet him…
Pain. Pure pain.
That was what the whole hour of choir was like. The first fuckin’ thing I had to do in that choir was attempt to match the piano notes Ms. Carlos had me sing, and everyone got to see how many attempts that took me. Even after I went to stand with the others and practice the songs they were singing, I blushed profusely, knowing the girls to my left and my right heard how off-key I was. Eventually, I just decided to mime singing. After all, I wasn’t in the choir to sing. I was there to get closer to the Canary.
After choir concluded, it dawned on me that I had only barely gotten my foot in the door. I was thinking about this like the Canary was Jordan, or Kevin, or even Quinn. Even Quinn was a god of popularity next to Hunchback. Once people began to disperse after choir was over, most of us would hang around and talk to our friends while we gathered our things. Hunchback wasn’t just unpopular, the dude was used to getting bullied. I realized very quickly my mistake, and remembered my own past behaviors – he was out of the choir room as quickly as if he were shot out of a cannon.
I winced in annoyance. This was getting nowhere fast. It was clear that there was never going to be a moment where Hunchback met with me after school and asked if I needed tutoring or something. Besides, none of the Hazelwood Underground were ever going to resort to the tired trope of ‘see if the popular girl needs tutoring to get to know her.’ That was so beneath them.
I flushed as I realized what I needed to do. All of this embarrassing shit had better pay some serious fuckin’ dividends… I took a piece of sheet music I saw on the floor and bolted out of the room after him. Luckily, he didn’t have too much of a head start on me, and I caught up with him pretty quickly. “Hey!” I called after him. “Hey!”
The second time, he turned around, an uneasy look on his face. He didn’t say anything and just looked at me. From the poor guy’s look, it seemed like he was expecting me to hit him or something.
I breathed a few times, out of breath from catching up to him, and held up the paper. “I think you dropped this,” I told him. “It looked like it fell to the floor when you left.”
He looked at me, then at the piece of paper. Slowly, he reached forward, grabbing the paper. He looked at it, then looked at me, confused. “Um, this is for the altos… I’m a bari.”
Oh, right. Different singers would sing different notes, wouldn’t they? “Oh, uh, really?” I asked, snatching the paper back. “…Huh, my bad,” I added, looking the paper over. “I’m Robyn, by the way.”
“I know, your name was on the blackboard,” he told me.
I had to do everything, didn’t I? “Well, that’s one of us who knows the other person’s name, that’s a start,” I laughed. He remained still, and I sighed. “What’s your name?”
“Why do you want to know?” he asked me uneasily.
I stared at him for a second. Definitely the defensive bullied type. I pursed my lips, realizing that taking the scenic route to the point was putting a serious dent in my travel budget. Being indirect was really making things complicated for me – it was time to make things easier. “I’ve seen you before in class, but I don’t know your name,” I told him. “Whenever you were in class, people were mean to you and shit, but… but, uh, in choir, you seemed to actually be yourself. It was, uh, inspiring,” I lied. “You seem cool, and I… can I be honest with you? I’m trying to be less of a bitch. I’ve been a real bitch sometimes, and I’m trying to… you know?”
Hunchback nodded. “Yeah, I remember,” he replied naturally. As if… as if I was a bitch. It took me every ounce of my energy to not react to that. “I like that you want to change.”
I remained frozen in place for a second, then chuckled. “Um, it’s not like I was ever a bitch to you, I hope…” I added, hoping to get some context.
Hunchback chuckled, as if we were sharing a joke. “No, not me,” he admitted, then shrugged. “But I know what you’re t-talking about.”
Well, that made one of us. “Sure, so… let’s start over? Hi, I’m Robyn, Robyn Cooper.”
“I’m, uh, Jeremy,” he replied with unease.
“Jeremy. Alright,” I repeated, then looked around. No one else was nearby. “Do you think it’s fair to say that people underestimate you a lot, Jeremy?”
“Um… what do you mean?” he asked.
“Oh, y’know,” I replied casually. “Like, people are too worried about their reputations or whatever, so they won’t say what they actually feel, but you kinda realize you’re smarter than that and can tell what’s going on?” I leaned in closer. “We have a mutual friend. Jordan Miller?”
Confusion quickly turned into mutual understanding on Jeremy’s face. “Ohhh, okay,” he replied, the cogs turning. “You want in?”
Holy shit, that was easy. Fucking finally. “Um, yeah, kinda. Just to see what’s going on, you know?”
“I’d need to talk to him first about it,” Jeremy admitted, playing with his hands. “It’s kind of hard to onboard someone new in the middle of a campaign.”
Damn, a campaign. And they were in the middle of one even now, huh? I eagerly nodded. “I totally understand. I wanted to talk to him about it, but I don’t think he’s the best person to go to in order to… y’know…”
“I didn’t know he was going to tell anyone else about it,” Jeremy admitted slowly.
Fuck, right. Rule one. “Oh, he didn’t!” I reassured him. “I… hear things. Y’know.”
He stared at me for a bit, but seemed to accept that. “Okay. Well, yeah, you went to the right person,” he told me.
Relief splashed across my face. “That’s so awesome to hear. Seriously,” I told him.
“I didn’t think you were the type, if I can be honest,” he continued.
I shrugged, still smiling… and stared at him. He had such hope on his face. Part of me realized that… this wasn’t just me wanting to join the Hazelwood Underground. This was also just me treating him like a human being. What if this was… outside of the norm for him? “Uh, by the way, even if it doesn’t work out, I meant what I said about you really liking what you do. I, um… to be honest I don’t know exactly how I was being a bitch, but… I do actually wanna change. You’re a cool guy, Jeremy.”
“Am I cool?” he said, half in surprise, half in cynicism.
I rolled my eyes. “You’re a guy that doesn’t deserve to get shit on just for existing. How’s that?”
Jeremy nodded, smiling. “Thanks. That’s, um, nice to hear. And I’ll get back to you about the Jordan thing. I was supposed to meet up with him tomorrow, but I think he’ll be in detention.”
I folded my arms and chuckled. “Wow. He’s always gotta be Jordan, huh?”
“Well, I don’t know if it’ll stick. The report was just filed today, and I was in the right place at the right time to hear about it,” he continued, as if I knew what that meant. I just shrugged in confusion. “Oh, sorry. Hazelwood has this system where if a student gets in trouble, there’s this shelf in the main office where a report is submitted. Reports are sent in writing. Then the office staff read it and print out detention slips and stuff. Jordan just texted me today, so…”
I stared him down. “So why won’t it stick?”
Jeremy smiled. “How much can I trust you?”
***
“This is so crazy,” I murmured as Jeremy fiddled with the office lock.
“I’ve almost got it, just keep watching the hall,” he told me distractedly. I kept looking out until I heard a click, then the door open. “Bingo,” he murmured. “Get in, get in.”
I dashed into the office and Jeremy walked in behind me. As soon as he was in, he shut the door. I flicked the lights on and he immediately hissed, “Off!” I jumped, then turned the lights off. “No lights,” he told me.
My heart was pounding. Kevin danced around it, and Jordan was smug, but Jeremy just met me and immediately involved me in the craziest scheme I’d ever been involved with! It was also becoming crystal clear that ‘don’t talk about the Hazelwood Underground’ was seemingly more Kevin’s rule than anyone else’s. “Do you do stuff like this in your campaign with Jordan?” I whispered.
Jeremy paused. “Well, in a hypothetical sense…” he began gingerly.
I rolled my eyes. I suppose all of them had to resort to lawyer talk eventually.
“Anyway, the shelf is right over here. All I have to do is find Jordan’s and make it disappear,” Jeremy explained.
I shook my head in confusion. “Won’t this get him in more trouble though?” I asked. “Like, if this gets filed, then it goes missing, and the teacher that files it asks why nothing happened…”
Jeremy shook his head. “Teachers don’t actually give a crap about that,” he explained. “They’re not going to check in after filing the report; that’s not their job. They just figure that punishments happen. Sure, a lot of teachers will punish kids for what happens in their class, but as long as it’s bigger than what happens in one classroom, it’s not their responsibility. I’m not sure about this, but I think there’s also some kind of rule that teachers aren’t supposed to follow up with their students or hold it over their heads if they submit a report like this.”
“…Why?”
“Because it’s tasteless? I don’t know, I don’t work here. All I know is, I’ve done this for a few friends a couple of times,” he noted as he rummaged through some shelves.
“That’s crazy,” I breathed excitedly. “What did Jordan get in trouble for?”
“We’re about to find out,” he replied.
“And why do you trust me so much immediately?” I asked, feeling like this guy was the only actual competent member of the Hazelwood Underground.
“Wow, you love to ask questions,” he laughed. “I don’t know. You… talked to me like a person? That was… pretty cool.”
“What, no one else does that?” I scoffed, looking away. He didn’t reply, and I noticed the sounds of rummaging stopped. I looked back at him to see him staring intently at me. It clicked. “Seriously?” I asked in surprise. “I’m, uh, sorry.”
“You were the one to tell me I get in shit for existing,” he reminded me.
I smiled again. “So this is your way of getting back at the system?” I asked with naughty defiant glee.
“Nope. My life just sucks, actually. I do this because I want to,” he told me bluntly. “Here we go. Miller, Jordan.” He turned on a flashlight on his phone and began to read the report over, and I walked up behind him to read the report. With his hunched-over posture, it was hard to catch a glimpse.
He whistled. “Improper actions on school property… of a sexual nature. Wow.”
I froze. For a second, panic surged through me. “D-does it mention who he was doing it with?” I asked, trying to mask the fear in my voice. “It takes two to tango, right?”
“Good point,” he replied absent-mindedly, and looked the report over. “…Huh. Nothing here. I guess they’re filed individually. Hey, go check out the other files.”
He sure didn’t need to fuckin’ tell me twice. The last thing I wanted him to see just after meeting me was a report in writing that I sucked Jordan’s dick on school property. I moved to the shelf and picked up the one report left, dreading to see my name.
“Need a light?” Jeremy asked.
“No!! Uh, no, thanks,” I stammered. “I brought my own.” I fumbled with my phone until the flashlight turned on, then looked over the report.
The bolded text popped out to me first – it showed the offence. This one wasn’t for sexual misconduct. Assistance in academic cheating on a grand scale… this was for something completely different. I looked up to the name and gasped. Quinn Shen. The General. The Shen-eral?
The gasp made Jeremy peer over. “Who is it?”
“It’s something different…” I murmured. “It’s for Quinn. He got caught… giving answers to…” I read over the report. “Like, an entire English class, holy shit…” It looked like this was the General’s latest mission, but I guess he got caught. This was definitely expulsion-worthy shit.
“Who?” Jeremy asked.
“Quinn, Quinn Shen.”
“Oh, one of the twins. I thought he was the quiet one!” he marvelled.
“It’s always the quiet ones…” I murmured. I couldn’t help but wonder if Jeremy was trying to downplay this. After all, Quinn was his coworker in all this… right? “What should we do with this?”
“I dunno. I’m just here for Jordan’s file,” Jeremy simply replied.
“What, you don’t care if Quinn faces the firing squad for this?” I asked incredulously.
Jeremy shrugged. “I’m here for this file,” he repeated, waving it. “Do what you want.”
Do what you want. What if… this was a test? A test in disguise? Jeremy brought me here right after knowing me, after all… What if… what if Kevin already talked to him?
“You’re close with Kevin, right? Quinn’s brother?” I asked Jeremy.
Jeremy stared at me for a bit, but conceded. “We talk occasionally, yeah,” he admitted.
That was good enough for me. “We’re taking both of these,” I confirmed. “So what, we rip them up and throw them in the trash?”
“Not in here,” Jeremy chided me. “We can’t leave evidence in their garbage cans. I take ‘em home, then use my dad’s paper shredder.”
“Can you shred both of these?” I asked him as we walked towards the office door.
“I suppose it’s not riskier than already shredding the one…” he admitted, then held up a hand to hold me back. He peered out the office window, between the blinds. “Clear. Move quick.”
The two of us left the office, and Jeremy locked it from the inside before shutting the door. Once he shut the door, he jiggled the knob, confirming it was locked. “And we’re good,” he murmured.
I stared at the sheet in my hand, then had an idea. “Actually, can I hang onto this?” I asked him.
Jeremy shrugged. “Sure,” he replied. “Just maybe don’t let anyone know you have it. Especially not staff me- well, you already knew – you know.”
I chuckled. “Yeah, I got it,” I giggled, then shifted my feet. “This was a crazy first impression, huh? I guess people can surprise you.”
Jeremy chuckled back. “For so long I was waiting for something to happen. Like, you were going to reveal your true reason for talking to me or hit me or something.”
“Hit you?!” I asked in shock. “Am I really that much of a bitch?”
“No, it’s just…” Jeremy replied lamely, his confidence shrinking back. In lieu of saying anything else, he shrugged, then spoke again after a pause. “You gotta admit, no one just walks up to… anyone out of the blue like that. It sure doesn’t happen to me.”
I frowned in thought. If people didn’t talk to him much, I wonder why he was called the Canary… Oh. I understood. People never suspected him, so he could do things – like, say, sneak into the office and yoink a record or two – and no one would ever suspect a ‘loser’ like him. “Um, I guess,” I lamely mumbled after realizing he was waiting for me to speak. “Yeah. I’m sorry.”
“Don’t be. This was… neat. I like that you didn’t freak out,” he admitted.
“Freak out? This was the coolest thing ever!” I said with a smile. “Can I add you on something? We should definitely stay in contact.”
“Oh right. After all, you wanted to join the group…” Jeremy mumbled to himself, taking out his phone.
I laughed. “Wow, you’re so much more open about it,” I marveled. How refreshing.
Jeremy nodded. “Yeah, no kidding. Honestly? I think Jordan’s kind of embarrassed.”
“Embarrassed?!” I replied in shock. “It’s like the coolest thing!”
“Right?” Jeremy asked. “I think part of it’s that he’s embarrassed to be doing anything with me, but-”
“So, like, did you get him into it?” I asked him curiously.
He shrugged. “He dabbled a bit beforehand. Simple missions, the kind of thing you could start and finish in a day.”
I nodded along, and we swapped information. Soon after, any confidence our escapades gave Jeremy melted away and he awkwardly bid me farewell before walking off. It made sense that Jordan would be embarrassed. I didn’t really think about it, but all things considered, it was a bit of a loser’s club. Jeremy was the opposite of popular, people were only starting to learn Quinn’s name this year, and Kevin-
Quinn and Kevin. I almost forgot. Urgently, I typed a text to Kevin and asked him if he was still at the school. He wasn’t, but I quickly convinced him it was in his best interests that we meet up for a little chat.
***
Kevin gave me his signature smug look when I told him it was important. After he closed my bedroom door, I handed him the paper, and with a confident smirk, he took it. “And this was ‘life and death,’ huh?” he asked me rhetorically as he sat on his knees on the bed, then began to read.
I joined him, sitting on the bed to face him. As he read, his smug look faded. His eyes widened and widened, and suddenly, he was gripping the paper. “Yo, what the fuck…” he breathed.
I crossed my arms. “See?” I asked. “Your little General seemed to get caught in his latest campaign.”
“Robyn, I-” he choked. He shook his head as he continued to read. “Jesus. Multiple students were overheard saying he did this, too…”
“Did you know anything about this? I mean, it sure looks like Quinn gave test answers to a whole English class. This is… big, right? Were you involved, are you safe?”
“Rob-” Kevin began angrily, then stopped himself, breathing in and out a few times. “Um, no, I wasn’t even informed about this. Look, uh, Robyn, I’m gonna blow the lid off this operation for a sec – Quinn isn’t involved.”
“Huh? His name’s right there,” I replied in confusion.
“No, like, he’s not the General. I’m not just saying that. This shit is more shocking to me than you, believe me.”
I paused. “But… his meeting with Morgan. And the way he talked about me.”
“He’s been tutoring Taylor. Morgan wanted to talk to him about their situation, or he wanted to talk to her. Whatever. Either way,” Kevin explained.
I leaned in. “…And the way he was talking about me?”
“Literally talking about Taylor. I’m not gonna lie, it was funny at the time, but- yeah, sorry.”
I blinked, then my brow furrowed. “And you didn’t say anything?!”
“Robyn, for fuck’s sake, what’s the one thing I’ve mentioned to you literally every time we bring up the group?” Kevin shouted. “I’m not gonna say who is or isn’t involved.”
“So then what’s this? Quinn is actually that quiet, and just did this wildly out-of-character shit coincidentally?” I asked, laughing at the stupidity of the whole thing.
“Literally yes,” Kevin answered. “Like… I just…” He stared at the paper again. “Quinn, what the fuck are you up to…”
“Sounds like hanging out with Taylor is changing him,” I observed.
“Yeah, no kidding,” he murmured, his eyes scanning over the whole paper. He looked up at me. “So what now?”
I chuckled. “What, you don’t listen to your own Canary?”
He paused… for longer than I expected. “He… does his own thing a lot,” Kevin admitted.
Damn, I guess that made me special then. I got to tag along and Kevin never did, huh? Jeremy, you charmer. “Well, if this was filed away, it means it hasn’t been processed yet. Office staff literally don’t know Quinn’s in trouble. We just shred it.”
Kevin paused, internally arguing with my logic, but then his eyes widened in thought. “Oh, and the teachers that file these aren’t responsible for…”
“Bingo,” I replied smugly.
“Oh my God,” Kevin murmured. “Robyn, I could fucking kiss you right now.”
I thought that I’d have a weird reaction to hearing that, especially from Kevin of all people, but I just gave a comfortable laugh. “Sounds more tender than anything Jordan could do…”
“You and him still, huh?” he asked quietly, looking up from the paper.
I shrugged. “We might stop though. A lot of it is on school property. Actually – oh right. Remember how I said that was the whole reason J- the Canary and me went in? Yeah, he was almost in trouble for having sex on school property.”
“Wow,” he said with a nod. “Were you named in the-”
“Nah. Just him.”
Kevin nodded silently, then shrugged. “That could be anybody,” he admitted. “Well, any girl.”
I laughed uncomfortably, then eyed the paper, still in Kevin’s grip. “So, uh…” I replied, quieter than usual. “I did good?”
“Robyn, you did amazing,” Kevin replied.
“I know you asked me not to pressure you about bringing me up to the group, but like… keep this in mind,” I added, with just a hint of smugness. “I don’t care if Quinn is in the group or not. Pretend I did this for you. I mean, I was thinking about you too, and like, what it would mean to you, and…”
Kevin slowly smiled. “I was joking about the kiss,” he clarified. “Can I hug you though?”
“Yeah, of course,” I replied. He inched forward and wrapped his arms around me. Kevin was actually pretty warm. It felt pretty good to get hugged by him. We stayed like that for a few seconds… then a few seconds longer.
I clued into how long the hug was lasting, but… I didn’t move away. I just savored it. It was funny – if you asked me, even at that exact moment, if I like liked Kevin, even for a casual thing, I would have said “fuck no.” And yet we kept up our embrace for like half a minute… and then when Kevin was the first one to loosen the hug, we didn’t even fully break away. We kept holding each other close, and just looked each other in the eye… then our faces came closer and closer together. Before I even knew what was happening, we were kissing.
It was supposed to feel wrong. I didn’t even like Kevin. He didn’t even like me. Why were we doing this?! I had no fucking clue… but I also knew that next to Jordan, or fucking Matthew, or… wow, even Ben… it felt safe. Natural.
We broke off the kiss and just looked at each other. Eventually, I had to start laughing, and so did Kevin. “Joking about the kiss, huh?” I asked softly.
“Yeah, I – sorry. I dunno where that came from. Genuinely,” he admitted. “Why, are you okay w-”
“Yeah,” I admitted. “I… shouldn’t be? Not because of you or anything, but-”
“Yeah, I know what you mean,” he admitted. “Um, maybe we sh- hmm…”
“What?” I asked, sitting back.
“Um, this might be silly, but just… I dunno if we should do this if we’re… um…” He cleared his throat and put his hands out in front of him. “Just, just let me ask a simple question. Would you be okay with doing this with me even if you never heard about the Hazelwood Underground?”
I paused, trying to figure out his game. “Um, we probably wouldn’t be talking, but… so I guess it’s hard to answer.”
“Yeah, fair enough. Let’s say it dissolves tomorrow. Would you be okay that we did this?” He kept going.
“What, is it like a power dynamic thing?” I asked, and he shrugged. “Um, well, I mean, it literally just happened. But yeah, I didn’t just kiss you because you’re in some group, Kevin. I mean, I’m not sure if I’m looking for… anything romantic…”
Kevin nodded. “Yeah, that… probably wouldn’t be the best course of action for me either,” he admitted. “Arright. Um… did you… should we…”
I shrugged and smiled. “I’d be down if you are,” I admittedly.
Kevin looked adorably flustered. “Arright, cool. Yeah, uh, let’s…” That was the last thing he said before we started kissing again. Kevin was a really gentle kisser; it was actually kind of cute. Whenever he talked he was all authority, and here he was, tender and almost shy. I enjoyed the feeling of my lips on his, and occasionally playfully licked his bottom lip, giggling to myself when I felt him shudder in response.
After dealing with Jordan’s rough commanding presence, it was so nice to take my time with a boy for once. Even Matthew liked to fast-track things. But with Kevin, things felt a little different. We just sat there, kissing on our bed, as minute after minute passed us by. There was never any pressure to get to some kind of “main event.” It was just… two people enjoying each other. It was really nice.
As our kiss broke off, I smiled at him. He gave me a shy smile back. “I hope this doesn’t change anything,” he admitted, cheeks burning.
I shook my head no. “Nothing,” I promised. “Trust me, I’m used to just having fun and not making it weird.”
Kevin chuckled. “Arright,” he conceded. “I should probably go home and…” He glanced at the paper. “And have a fuckin’ word with Quinn. But, like, in any other circumstance I would genuinely love to stay behind and… I mean, it’s like-”
I put my finger to his lips, smiling. “I get it,” I soothed him. Wow, this was a whole new side to the guy. I… liked it. This was new. I thought I didn’t like Kevin even as a friend when this began. Maybe… maybe I needed to give people a chance after all.
Kevin looked at the paper. “I probably shouldn’t even take this with me,” he noted. “Can you destroy it, by any chance? Whatever way you want, just make sure it’s not even readable. None of us want this coming back to bite us.”
“No kidding,” I said with a nod.
“I’ll take a walk around the main hallway tomorrow to make sure there are no video cameras. I don’t think they usually put video cameras in the main office though. Why would they when that’s the room that views the cameras?” At this point he was mumbling to himself. This must have been what it looked like when he was planning a job. Or a campaign as they seemed to call it.
I nodded again. “I think my parents have a shredder somewhere. I’ll take care of it. You’ll never see it again.”
“Okay,” he replied, nodding. “Thanks. We, uh, probably just saved Quinn’s life.”
My smile got bigger. I couldn’t resist. “I really enjoyed doing it,” I admitted. “I’d be happy to do stuff like this more often. I’m serious.”
Kevin laughed, but in an uneasy way. “I bet you are,” he noted. “It’s… not all up to me. I’m not the leader. But this definitely changes a lot.” He bit his lip. “In a lot of ways.”
I laughed. “Hey, don’t be cute!”
“I wasn’t trying to be cute!” he argued cutely.
“Yeah well, try harder,” I replied with a smirk, and we both got up. “You free sometime next week?”
“Yeah. Even if I’m not, yeah. I’ll be free,” Kevin borderline stammered. Damn, this was a complete 180 from the confident methodical Kevin I was so used to seeing normally. He got up and I followed, with the both of us opening my bedroom door together. I walked him out and despite what we just did, we didn’t even hug on the way out. We just smiled at each other and exchanged ‘bye’s in quiet voices.
That didn’t stop a certain someone from smirking at me when I shut the front door. I turned around to see Serena, arms folded, a shit-eating grin on her face.
“What?” I asked.
“You and him, huh?” she just asked.
“Um, no,” I lied. “He came over to talk about… about a class assignment.”
“Oh, okay,” Serena replied, nodding. “That’s cool, that’s cool. So all those kissing sounds I heard-”
I grabbed a nearby hat off a hook and threw it at her. “Stop listening at my fucking door when I have friends over!!” I yelled.
Serena giggled and ran off, reappearing around the corner only to giggle again, holding up airquotes and repeating, “‘Friends.’” She was rewarded with a hat thrown right at her face.
“I’m serious,” I called after her as she ran away. “I… we’re not together. We’re just… God, I don’t want to have this conversation with you.”
“Experimenting?” she nosily asked.
“I literally just said I don’t want to have this conversation with you,” I complained. She never could let me process this shit in peace. An hour ago, I never would have thought of kissing Kevin. And now, embarrassingly… it was all I was thinking about. I stood there, staring into space, thinking about it… when I heard Serena giggle again. With a groan, I stomped off to my room.
***
Kevin and I didn’t end up making it into next week. Two days later, we were back on my bed, only this time he was on top of me. He was getting a little more used to things, and getting a little more confident. Once he had accepted that his full weight was going to be on top of me, he started to slowly grind into me. And, I had to admit – it was amazing.
I moaned into our kisses and ran my hands up and down his back, eventually finding the hem of his shirt. He broke the kiss to give me a surprised look, but I just winked at him in response.
He actually kept himself in pretty decent shape. It helped that he was a skinny guy, so any muscles he had were on full display. We went back to us kissing, though eventually Kevin’s kisses moved a little south down to my neck.
“N-no evidence,” I reminded him. I didn’t know if Jordan would care about hickeys, but I was not about to take that risk. Plus, if I was seen with hickeys and no boyfriend… drama city. Kevin complied, gently kissing my neck and grinding into me, as I exhaled in pleasure and ground right back. My fingertips danced along the skin of his back. So smooth, yet with hard muscle underneath… and so warm. It felt so nice.
After way too long – like, fifteen minutes – Kevin’s hands finally got a little bolder, and his hands went down my shirt, then to my waist. His hand went closer and closer to my sex, causing me to emit a louder-than-I-intended moan.
“Ssh,” he shushed me. His eyes remained on mine as his hand got closer and closer to my entrance, wordlessly telling me to tell him if I wasn’t okay with where this was going. I was very okay with it, and bit my lip as I moved my hips forward to meet his hands.
Kevin shoved forwards with a little too much force, causing me to wince. It made sense that he had less experience with Jordan, but still: ow. “C-careful,” I replied in slight pain. “Less shoving, more exploring. Go gentle; almost, like, caress it.”
“Oh, okay, sorry,” Kevin replied, taking my notes in stride. He adjusted his movements and listened for my reactions, and soon we weren’t even kissing anymore. Instead, Kevin was delicately rubbing my slit over my pants with his thumb, and looking back and forth from at his handiwork to my eyes.
“Shit,” I moaned, getting up and ditching the pants before sitting back down. I blushed at my neediness, but grabbed his hand and guided it back to my pussy. “Keep going… please,” I gently ordered.
Kevin gladly complied. I wasn’t sure if I was the first girl he got to fool around with like this, but honestly, it didn’t even matter. All I knew was that this felt great and I was in no mood for him to stop anytime soon.
I leaned back, mashing my face into a pillow and moaning into it while Kevin’s fingers got better in real time at pleasing me. He got into a good rhythm, rubbing his middle finger up and down my slit, even finding and playing with my little clit, realizing that it made me jump. He was a fast learner – he seemingly not only noticed that it was my most sensitive spot, but also that too much sensitivity can be a bad thing. Very tastefully, he used his gifts sparingly, leaving me wanting more as opposed to getting easily overwhelmed.
I bet my eyes were glassy when I opened them again. All I knew was that it was Kevin’s turn. With renewed vigor, I got up and pushed Kevin back onto the bed, smiling reassuringly at him while removing his belt. “…Yeah?” was all I said.
“Oh wow, so this is happening, huh?” he chuckled nervously. “Um, let’s go for it! Fair warning, I’m not… I wouldn’t say I’m the most experienced guy on the planet.” My smile didn’t wane. I lowered his pants as he awkwardly tried to kick them away, sitting there in his boxers. “I also hope you’re… y’know, I hope you’re not like a size queen or anything. Of all the fucking stereotypes about Chinese guys to be true about me-”
“Kevin!” I almost barked. “Relax, alright? We’re both going to enjoy this. Don’t worry about living up to some expectation.”
“Easy for you to say, my whole life is living up to expectations,” he huffed, a sheepish smile on his face. I chuckled and delicately traced my fingertips up his legs and gently grabbed him through his boxers.
“You also have nothing to worry about,” I noted out loud. Sure, he wasn’t massive, but Kevin was… average. Which was literally fine. Hell, he could have been smaller and that would have been literally fine. It didn’t matter to me at all. I groped him through his boxers and he leaned back, blushing harder and grabbing handfuls of my bedsheets.
“Oh, shit, jesus…” he moaned. I smirked. My hands knew what they were doing, and I knew that, but it was nice to be reminded every so often. I played with him some more, and stroked his shaft over his boxers, before figuring that the fun was over. Slowly, I grabbed the top of his boxers, making sure he clued into what I was doing before slowly lowering them. Soon, his throbbing cock came into view.
Fuck, it was this hard for me. It was twitching so hard. I’d seen my fair share of dicks, and I couldn’t recall seeing one this happy to see me. Not wanting to leave it so desperate for too long, I brought Kevin to the edge of the bed and sank down to my knees on the floor. I was at eye-level with his throbbing cock.
“Want me to suck it?” I asked in a voice just above a whisper, although my smirk betrayed that we both knew the answer. Kevin, too amazed at the situation to coherently answer, could only nod. I nodded back, and gently gripped the base of his shaft, lowering my head to greet his.
I started slow. I gave the base of his shaft a kiss, then another, then another. I peppered kisses all along his length, then dragged my tongue along the whole length. My other hand was on his thigh, and I could feel his shudders every time I did something new. He was so… shy like this. So unlike Kevin. It was a good look for him, but I wasn’t about to tell him that.
“Oh my God,” he moaned, and gave another moan when I kissed his sensitive head. He was practically squirming in place, especially when I finally opened my mouth and took in his cock. It was so nice to suck one without having an assertive pair of hands on my head for once. I could go at my own pace. As a bonus, I was clearly blowing more than Kevin’s cock; I was blowing his mind too.
He struggled to keep in his moans, instead bunching up my bedsheets again. I started to bob my head back and forth, sucking him off and enjoying every vibration that passed through his body. Kevin was doing his best to hide his noises, and was now biting his wrist to keep himself from making anymore moans. Talk about a glowing approval.
His body went from vibrating to practically spasming in place, and I knew he was right on the verge of cumming. In that moment, I barely even remembered that the Hazelwood Underground existed – what mattered to me was that Kevin and I were enjoying ourselves, and I wanted to make sure he had as much fun as possible.
Fuck, that was a one-way goal whenever I was with Jordan. Hell, it was clear even with Matthew the vibes weren’t nearly that relaxed. Here, I was just… having fun. With a particularly sharp exhale, Kevin let loose, shooting spurt after spurt into my mouth. It started to leak out of the sides of my mouth, and I saw Kevin just about lift himself off of the bed in pure excitement before he laid back like a ragdoll, completely spent. Enjoying the difference between Kevin and Jordan’s behavior when they came, I reached for a nearby tissue and spat out the cum.
“You, uh… you’re something else…” Kevin breathed, a sheen of sweat evident all over his body.
I giggled. “Glad you enjoyed it,” I told him, throwing out the tissue and joining him beside me on my bed.
“Oh, wait, uh, do you want me to…?” Kevin asked, eyeing between my legs with a suddenly determined look.
“Nah,” I told him lazily. “Maybe another day.” I was fine taking this a little slower, even if it meant delaying my pleasure. Plus, if Kevin felt like he always had to overperform, I kind of wanted him to feel like once, just once, he could receive and not have to, like, pay for it. “We can take it slow. For now, I hope you enjoyed yourself.”
Kevin stared at me for a bit, clearly thinking something. “Did something happen?” he asked. “It feels like something big has changed.”
“It does,” I agreed, then looked out the window. “I dunno,” I admitted. “I can’t think of any one thing that happened. I’m just… feeling differently about stuff right now.”
“Okay… if you’re sure,” Kevin replied, then leaned back and chuckled. “Crazy week, huh?”
“They keep getting crazier,” I added.
“Hopefully at some point they’ll stop getting crazier and we’ll mellow out,” he mused.
I turned to him and smirked. “You have a lot more control over that than most students, don’t you think?”
He shook his head. “I may change how events play out, but events happen regardless. You ever taken about six hundred of the craziest people in society and tell them to sit down and shut up for seven hours a day? I feel like an inmate that keeps figuring out how to break out of prison. Trust me, we’re in the craziest time of our lives, and I don’t think I’m an agent of chaos. If anything, I’m just using patterns to see how we can bend things to a kind of order, and then I…” He gestured outwards with his hands. “Voom. It’s like conducting a symphony while everyone is trying to learn how their instruments work at the same time. There’s chaos, but there’s rules.”
I leaned on my arm, listening to him talking, dragging a finger over his naked chest. “Hey Kevin?”
“Yeah?”
“This is fun. I like when you share your thoughts with me like this,” I told him.
He blushed again. “Yeah, arright,” he laughed.
“I’m serious!” I told him.
“I’m sure you are,” he replied, getting up and putting his boxers back on.
“Did I say something?” I asked with a whinier tone. I kind of wanted him to continue.
“Nope, you didn’t, I just kinda… nope, you didn’t,” he repeated.
I frowned to myself, watching him dress. As he put his pants on, my eyes drifted from him to the door. I better had been the only one listening to him, swear to God… I put my own pants on, waiting for Kevin to get fully dressed himself, before gripping the doorknob tightly yet silently. With a solid swing, I pulled the door open to reveal… no one.
Kevin chuckled. “Wow, your door-opening game is fierce,” he joked.
“I was worried someone might be listening, I explained. Even if Serena knew Kevin and I were kissing at this point, I needed that to be the end of it for her. Kevin and I were kind of like the Hazelwood Underground at this point – the less people that knew about us, the better.
***
“Doesn’t make sense,” Jordan told me assertively, pacing back and forth as we stood in Room 203.
“I told you, I want to be more careful. We can even go to my pl- my place,” I continued, realizing halfway through that that would be the worst idea ever. Jordan, of all boys, was not going to be quiet, and Serena had the chance to let a lot of secrets fly if she was pushed too far. Well, too late, I already said it now. “But no more stuff in school.”
“Doesn’t make sense,” Jordan repeated, stopping his pacing. He stood in front of me and pointed an accusatory finger in my face. “I even did that asking bullshit. And now you’re punishing me for it? I’m doing what you wanted. You just push and push, Robyn.”
He was making me more grateful every minute that I started doing stuff with Kevin, but even still… fuck, seeing Jordan so domineering made me wet. “Jordan, I have it on good authority that we’re already under the magnifying glass here.”
“Speak English,” he barked.
Wow. I thought even French was good enough for him, but whatever. “Jordan, I know for a fact that you got written up for doing some kinda sex thing after school. You would have gotten in detention for it if we hadn’t come to your fuckin’ rescue.”
“‘We’?” Jordan questioned, never losing his commanding stance.
I rolled my eyes. “Jeremy, okay? I know you and him hang out.” Even though I was almost sure he was the Canary, I still didn’t want to just name him as that in front of Jordan. Even if I wasn’t wrong, he might have been as sensitive as Kevin about the ‘never talk about fight club’ thing they had going on.
That said, censoring myself didn’t help my case. Jordan’s eyes narrowed and I began to see a fire brew in his pupils. “I don’t know a Jeremy.”
“Yeah you do. Hunchback,” I retorted, and saw his back straighten. “Dude, I saw him risk his neck for you. I happened to be hanging out with him, he mentioned it, and we went into the office together to find and get rid of some file on you. It was for having sex on school property, by the way, so this concerns me too.” I finished, and he just stood there, menacingly. “Dude, we both saved your ass. The least you could do is acknowledge he exists and not look like a pouting baby about it!”
Jordan snapped his fingers and pointed at me again, closing the space between us. “Fucking watch it, bitch,” he snarled, emphasizing the ‘b’ in that way boys did when they were furious. I wanted to stand my ground, but ended up taking a step back. “I don’t know this ‘Jeremy’ retard.” He took another step towards me. “And if you’re just gonna make shit up just because you’re on your period or whatever, you can have it your way. You’re gonna suck my dick right now or you’re never going to get to again.”
Even though he was a sex god in human form, even though he was terrifying, despite all of that… I gave him an incredulous look. I found my strength. “Wow, dude,” I told him, my tone defiantly disappointed. “Just wow.”
It was crazy how angry he got over nothing. He breathed through his mouth and his nose simultaneously in anger, like bulls do. He said nothing for a while. He eventually leaned back, staring me down the whole time. “You were such a good girl too,” he told me.
I shrugged. “I still can be. You’re making a thing out of nothing, Jordan. I’m happy to just let this-”
Jordan closed the distance between us, forcing me to back up against the wall. His whole body was thrown assertively against mine. I was pinned to the wall. “Nothing?” he repeated. “You lied to me about some bullshit over and over. I didn’t get in trouble, I don’t hang out with some weirdo named Jeremy, and you didn’t save me. I don’t need saving. I save myself. Everything I got, that’s because of me! Do you fucking understand?!”
He was definitely scaring me right now. It didn’t help that with me pinned to the wall, I had no means of escape.
“Tell me you fucking understand!!” he roared, grabbing me by the neck with one hand and holding his other hand up.
“Alright, alright, I understand!” I practically shrieked.
“Damn right,” he told me, instantly loosening his grip on my neck and backing away. “Just understand me, Robyn. I gotta do shit to make sure I win in the world. I can’t have people tell me some bullshit about me. People don’t tell me about me, and that’s that.” He turned away to grab his stuff.
“You were going to hit me,” I told him slowly. Fearfully.
He slowly turned back around. He looked me up and down, maybe realizing how bad the situation looked. “Nah,” he finally said. “I wouldn’t actually. I guess, uh…” He scratched his head nervously. “I guess this goes against the whole asking thing, huh?”
“The asking thing?!” I asked incredulously. That was the downplaying of the century.
“Yeah,” he replied as if we were on the same page. “So I’m sorry and shit. Let’s sleep on this and talk tomorrow. But seriously though… no telling me about me, a’ight? Be nice.” Without letting me get another word in, he scooped up his backpack and confidently strode out of the room. That was that.
As soon as he left, I let my legs give out, and leaned sitting against the wall as I caught my breath. Holy shit. The guy had a fucking temper. I could probably guess that about him, but now I definitely got some firsthand evidence. Maybe it was because I sniffed too close to the Hazelwood Underground’s trail, or maybe it was genuinely just because Jordan didn’t want to be seen with an unpopular guy or some shallow shit. Hell, maybe it really just was that he never liked people telling him about him. I didn’t know. I didn’t care.
All this really meant was that I needed to stay the fuck away from him from now on. Hazelwood Underground and my own hormones be damned – nothing was worth this. I needed to stop talking to him, and I definitely needed to stop doing everything else with him. The dumbest thing I could have possibly done at this point was to let him keep having sex with me.
Bashful Scribe 